10 Habits Of The World’s Happiest People You Should Adopt

02 Apr 2018

I’ve dived into the most interesting habits of the happiest people in the world and decided to share them with you here. 

1. They enjoy the moment

It turns out that taking the time to “smell the roses” truly does enhance happiness in life. When you enjoy the small moments- good or bad- you’re more aware of what’s happening around you.

The happiest people focus on what they can control and it’s possible to choose happiness in the moment, no matter the struggles you may be going through.

2. They have a growth mindset

In the book Mindset, Carol Dweck explains that the most successful and happy people have what she calls a “growth mindset” compared to a “fixed mindset.” A fixed mindset seeks success as affirmation of intelligence or worth; a growth mindset thrives on challenge and sees failure not as evidence of unintelligence or unworthiness but as a catalyst for growth and stretching beyond existing abilities.

After twenty years of research, Dweck concluded that those with a growth mindset had happier relationships, achieved more success in the classroom, and were much more persistent through challenges.

3. They surround themselves with other happy people

Who we surround ourselves with has a huge impact on how we think, feel, and what direction we head in life. It may sound harsh, but cutting out the negative people in your life is necessary if you want to be happier.

You won’t have to confront them personally about this; it could just mean spending less time with them gradually so you can focus on improving yourself.

4. They have a dream

Without a future to look towards, the past is the only thing we can look back on.

Whether your dream is to travel the world, start your own business, or learn a new language, having a dream is one of the most important things in remaining optimistic when things get tough.

This concept of having a purpose is especially prevalent in Eastern Asia. In Japan, there’s an actual term called ‘ikigai’, which is translated as “the reason you wake up in the morning.” When some of the happiest and longest-living people were studied, they all had such a reason.

5. They can wait

The bigger the dream you have, the more patience you have to practice.

Happy people are willing to wait for the rewards and focus on the journey, how far they’ve come, and what’s ahead for them.

They understand that the best things in life come to those who are patient and can stick it out for the long run, whether that’s a job promotion, relationship, or a new skill they’re learning.

6. They schedule “me” time into their day

Saying “yes” to everything puts you on the fast track to being miserable.

Giving is important, but if that means taking up “your” time to relax, wind down, and learn new things, then you’ll have nothing to give over time.

You can’t always be agreeable; that’s how people take advantage of you. You have to set clear boundaries.

7. They spend money on experiences- not material things

That car that you just bought diminished in value the moment you drove it off the lot, but experiences are memories that will stay with you for the rest of your life.

The happiest people would rather go on a backpacking trip around Asia instead of buying a flat-screen TV that they’ll seldom use. According to Marc and Angel:

“Experiential purchases tend to make us happier for two key reasons: 1. Great experiences improve over time when we reminisce about them. 2. Experiences are often social events that get us out of our house and interacting with people we care about.”

8. They give more than they take

Since happy people live in a world of abundance where there’s always more opportunities to be had, more money to be made, and more love to share, they’re always giving when they can.

From raising money for a charity they care about, offering a dollar to a talented artist playing in the subway, to giving their precious time to mentor a mentee, they’re always giving.

As ironic as it may sound, happy people understand that this will actually make them happier in the end.

9. They embrace discomfort

According to psychologist Peter Kramer, resilience is the opposite of depression. Happy people know how to bounce back from failure. Resilience is a padding for the inevitable hardship human beings are bound to face. As the Japanese proverb goes, “Fall seven times and stand up eight.”

10. They are always learning

Despite his ASL, Stephen Hawking made prominent scientific discoveries. What is more, he found the words to tell the world about his findings.

Like Hawking, the happiest people all have one thing in common. They are lifelong learners, constantly reading new books, exploring other cultures, learning new languages, etc. It is an ongoing process because without growth there’s no life.

Source: Lifehack

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Letting go of control- and being okay with it.


Letting go of control… and being OK with it.

That is one of the greatest struggles many of us deal with on a daily basis, myself included.

Because letting go of control goes directly against our modernized, industrialized way of living – we are go-getters, doers, architects of our destiny. We build things and make things happen on our own terms; we don’t wait for anything to happen on someone else’s terms! At least that’s what I learned growing up from teachers, sports coaches, movies, songs, magazine articles, and so forth. So allowing things to happen was not in my DNA. I had never been one to sit back and passively let go of control.

Over the years, however, my perspective has shifted. I’ve grown mentally stronger, even as I’ve learned the hard way that a great deal of the control we believe we have over our lives is an illusion. For example, I’ve since met…

  • the young man who had his life turned upside down by cancer
  • the young woman, and mother of two, who lost her husband to death at 27
  • the hard-working employee who lost her job when her employer of 25 years filed for bankruptcy
  • the runner who lost his leg in a hit an run car accident
  • the mom whose son has Down syndrome despite her doing everything right during pregnancy

It happens every day—situations we think we have control over, but we really don’t.

So what can we do?

The only choice we have: Let go, and be mindful…

And although it sometimes takes a great deal of mental strength to do so, we CAN strengthen our minds gradually with practice…

In the game of life, we all receive a unique set of unexpected limitations and variables in the field of play. The question is: How will you respond to the hand you’ve been dealt? You can either focus on the lack thereof or empower yourself to play the game sensibly and resourcefully, making the very best of every outcome as it arises, even when it’s heartbreaking and hard to accept.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the mind is our biggest battleground. It’s the place where the strongest conflict resides. It’s where half of the things we thought were going to happen, never did happen. It’s where our expectations always get the best of us. It’s where we fall victim to our cravings to control the uncontrollable. And if we allow these thoughts and cravings to dwell in our minds, they will succeed in robbing us of peace, joy, and ultimately our lives. We will think ourselves into deep heartache and even depression.

Truthfully, there’s so much about life that we can’t control, it makes no sense to waste all our energy on these things and then blatantly neglect everything we CAN control.

We can choose how we spend our time right now. We can choose gratitude and grace. We can choose whom we socialize with—whom we share this day of our lives with. We can choose to love and appreciate the people in our lives for exactly who they are. We can choose to love and appreciate ourselves, too. We can choose how we’re going to respond to life’s surprises and disappointments when they arise, and whether we will see them as curses or opportunities for personal growth.

And, perhaps most importantly, we can choose to think better about our past and present circumstances, and let go of what we can’t control, so we can consciously make the best of the next chapter in our lives.


Source: marcandangel

True Love- A Constant (πππ™)

Flood waters can’t drown love,

Torrents of rain can’t put it out.

For love is as strong as death;

It’s jealousy unyielding as the grave.

Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove.

It is an ever fixed mark,

That looks on tempests and is never shaken.

Love is not blind,

It sees more not less;

But because it sees more…

It chooses to see less.

Love does not die easily.

It is a living thing

It thrives in the face of all life’s hazards, save one –  Neglect.

Love doesn’t just sit there  like a stone;

It has to be made,

Like bread- remade all the time,

Anew daily remade.

One half of  me is yours,

The other half yours-

Mine own I would say;

But if mine, then yours and so all yours!

For what you have is mine;

Our state cannot be severed;

We are one, one flesh;

To  lose thee were to lose myself.

I love thee, I love but thee;

With a love that shall not die;

Till the sun grows cold

And the stars grow old.

©verapoetry

Heart Broken? Remember these 6 Things

It’s a dull, subdued sensation when your heart is breaking, like the muffled sound of a distant gunshot. It doesn’t physically pierce your skin or tear you to pieces, but the sensation is physically present – the paralyzing discomfort of realizing that something you took for granted is leaving for good.

Although it’s hard to accept at first, this is actually a good sign, having a broken heart. It means you have loved something, you have tried for something, and you have let life teach you.

Life will attempt to break you down sometimes; nothing and no one can completely protect you from this reality. Remaining alone and hiding from the world won’t either; for endless, stagnant solitude will also break you with unhealthy nostalgia and yearning.

You have to stand back up and put yourself out there again. Your heart is stronger than you realize. I’ve been there and I’ve seen heartbreak through to the other side. It takes time, effort and patience.

Deep heartbreak is kind of like being lost in the woods – every direction leads to nowhere at first. When you are standing in a forest of darkness, you cannot see any light that could ever lead you home. But if you wait for the sun to rise again, and listen when someone assures you that they themselves have stood in that same dark place, and have since moved forward with their life, oftentimes this will bring the hope that’s needed.

It’s so hard to give you advice when you’ve got a broken heart, but some words can heal, and this is my attempt to give you hope. You are stronger than you know!

Please remember…

1. The person you liked or loved in the past, who took you for granted, has nothing intellectually or spiritually to offer you in the present moment, but more headaches and heartache. 

2. When you don’t get what you want, sometimes it’s necessary preparation, and other times it’s necessary protection. But the time is never wasted. It’s a step on your journey. Someday you’re going look back on this time in your life as such an important time of grieving and growing. You will see that you were in mourning and your heart was breaking, but your life was changing. 

3. Some chapters in our lives have to close without closure. There’s no point in losing yourself by trying to hold on to what’s not meant to stay. Remember this, and always keep two simple questions in mind: What opportunities do I have right now? What’s one small, positive step forward I can take today? 

4. One of the hardest lessons to learn: You cannot change other people. Every interaction, rejection and heartbreaking lesson is an opportunity to change yourself only. And there is great freedom and peace of mind to be found in this awareness. 

5. It’s always better to be alone than to be in bad company. And when you do decide to give someone a chance, do so because you’re truly better off with this person. Don’t do it just for the sake of not being alone. 

6. Be determined to be positive. Understand that the greater part of your misery or unhappiness from this point forward is determined not by your circumstances, but by your attitude.

Keep walking and working on yourself. Good luck!

What’s Holding You Back? ( sharpen your subconscious)

Did you know…

Zookeepers typically strap a thin metal chain to a grown elephant’s leg and then attach the other end to a small wooden peg that’s hammered into the ground. The 10-foot tall, 10,000-pound elephant could easily snap the chain, uproot the wooden peg and escape to freedom with minimal effort. But it doesn’t. In fact the elephant never even tries. The world’s most powerful land animal, which can uproot a tree as easily as you could break a toothpick, remains defeated by a small wooden peg and a flimsy chain.

Why?

Because when the elephant was a baby, its trainers used the exact same methods to domesticate it. A thin chain was strapped around its leg and the other end of the chain was tied to a wooden peg in the ground. 

At the time, the chain and peg were strong enough to restrain the baby elephant. When it tried to break away, the metal chain would pull it back. Sometimes, tempted by the world it could see in the distance, the elephant would pull harder. But the chain would not budge, and soon the baby elephant realized trying to escape was not possible. So it stopped trying.

Now that the elephant is all grown up, it sees the chain and the peg and it remembers what it learned as a baby – the chain and peg are impossible to escape. 

Of course this is no longer true, but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that the 200-pound baby is now a 10,000-pound powerhouse. The elephant’s self-limiting thoughts and beliefs prevail!

The key thing to realize is this: We need to learn from the past, but be ready to update what we learned based on how our circumstances have changed (as they constantly do).

In other words, we have to learn to think better about the past and present, so we can ultimately live better from here on out. 

All too often we let the rejections from our past dictate every move we make. We literally don’t know ourselves to be any better than what some opinionated person or a narrow patch in life once tended our thoughts into thinking that some negative aspects about who we are is true. An old rejection never means we are not good enough; it’s just a sign some person or circumstance from the past was not aligned with what we had to offer them at the moment. 

However,sadly enough,we don’t see it that way- hence we snug and hit a mental barricade that stops us cold in our tracks. This is one of the most common damaging thought patterns we most often sucuumb to.

Even though we intellectually know that we’re stronger and our strengths plus mental capacities have stretched-compared to what we were at the past- the subconscious mind always forgets to roger and copy these changes. And this all the more raises the need to keep sharpening the mind and pushing forward without relent.

It only takes 21 days to create a habit and 90 days to settle into that lifestyle. Remember you are never alone, we’re all struggling and pushing in our lanes of life and I know things always get better- only when you keep the hope alive.

Thinking better takes guidance and practice.

*adopted from Hacklife

Authentic – Live, Don’t Just Exist!(Learn & Believe).


“I don’t think others like me. They like versions of me that I have somehow spun for them… versions of me that they have invented in their minds… versions of me with only the characteristics that are easy to like. But that’s not who I really am. And it scares me. After all, who’s going to like the girl that can’t stop second-guessing herself? The girl that cries? The girl that’s losing control? The girl that hides from her problems? The girl that keeps pushing everyone away? Who’s going to like the weakness in me… who’s going to like the real me?”

I have struggled with these thoughts before while going through a moderate bout of depression. What gradually healed me was the realization that running away from myself was a race I’d never win — that the willingness to own my truth and be openly vulnerable about it was the only path forward. 

Doing so, of course, wasn’t easy — it’s one of the most brutal lessons I’ve ever had to learn. And yet, it’s this lesson that ultimately makes my life more beautiful, by showing me how to thrive even through the toughest of times.

Being vulnerable means accepting who you are and having the courage to share it with the world. To show up, not as who you think you should be or who you want people to think you are, but as the real YOU, and to be open and welcoming to however the world responds. It’s risky, but not nearly as hazardous as giving up on true love and honesty and acceptance – the priceless experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the dark corners of ourselves will we discover the hidden power of our inner light.

 So please remember, no matter what age, race or sex you are, underneath all your external decorations you are a pure, beautiful being. You have light to shine, and missions to accomplish. Celebrate being different, off the beaten path, a little on the weird side, your own special creation. If you find yourself feeling like a fish out of water, by all means find a new stream to swim in. But don’t deny yourself… embrace yourself!

Be YOU in a world that’s trying to influence every move you make.

Take the road less traveled when it feels right under your feet.

Do more than just exist. We all exist. The question is: Do you live?

Own your truth. And LIVE!

So you can learn from life and believe in your journey again.

In fact, only remember two words from this: “Learn” and “Believe.”

*Learn: learn through experience. Learn from others. Remain humble, open-minded and teachable. Put yourself out there and let it all sink it. Push yourself to the edge of your comfort zone, so you can expand it and grow a little more confident every day.

*Believe… in yourself and your ability to succeed. Believe in your intuition, especially when you have to choose between two good paths. Believe that the answers are out there waiting. Believe that life will surprise you again and again. Believe that it’s all worth your while. Believe that you are confident enough to see it through.

#happy valentines. Lots of love 🙂


#real

With a new year comes new expectations and resolutions- maybe brought forward from the previous year or freshly redrafted. Bottom line is life can set you on a never ending high pressure roll a coaster. 
If you simply feel like life has been tougher than usual lately, here are some mantras i find useful personally to help you get your thinking back on track, so you can feel better about today and what must be done…

1. No matter what, you can always fight the battles of just today. It’s only when you add the infinite battles of yesterday and tomorrow that life gets overly complicated. Always focus on taking life a day at a time. A step at a time.


2. Never assume that you are stuck with the way things are right now. Life changes every single second, and so can you. Change is the only constant thing in life. Be flexible and look forward to it.

3. Life always begins now – right now – not tomorrow or the next day or the next. It means you can have the new beginning you want whenever you want. When we realize our lives are all about our choices and we have control and will over what we choose to do…there is never a right time to start than now.

4. Even when it’s tough, wear a smile. Smiling doesn’t always mean you’re happy – sometimes it simply means you’re strong. And you are. Plus positive vibes do attract positive responses. Dullness dampens the spirit.

5. Think of all the hundreds of thousands of steps and missteps and chances and coincidences that have brought you here. In a way it feels like the biggest miracle in the world, doesn’t it? Keep this in mind, and meditate on the fact that you are a work in progress, and every great success requires some kind of struggle to get there. Even if you feel vision less you are where you are supposed to be today and at this moment. Live it. Learn it. Explore it. Above all..enjoy it for it may be a one off thing.

The bottom line is that you can use pain, frustration and inconvenience to motivate you rather than annoy you. Be mindful. Stress primarily comes from the way you respond, not the way life is. Adjust your attitude and the stress is gone. You control the way you look at life.

Ultimately, your hardest challenges will teach you your best lessons. Stay positive, work hard, make it happen, one small step at a time. Be careful not to fall back into your old patterns. Toxic habits and behaviors always try to sneak back in when you’re doing better. Stay focused.

*Marcandangel